Pleasure… what is it?

The definition of pleasure as found in a dictionary is “a feeling of happy satisfaction and enjoyment”.

We are naturally built to seek and feel pleasure, as it helps us define what is good for us.

Although often associated with sex, pleasure can manifest itself in various forms in our daily lives. We find pleasure in eating a delicious meal, listening to some music, or we can experience it through a sensory journey, particularly with touch.

We struggle to feel pleasure mainly because we feel guilty when we do. The physiological features of pleasure are similar to those felt when we are anxious. Similar pathways in our bodies get triggered.

Pleasure is good for us because it creates changes in our bodies (hormones, nervous system, immune system and more), and enables us to feel a connection with whomever we share pleasure with.

Although pleasure brings us enjoyment, it is not something that can be forced. As we learn what brings us pleasure, we also learn how to get it through a journey of discovery of our pleasure system (what we want and how we want it). Pleasure is an internal experience.

Pleasure is not a predictable feeling, it will take us wherever when we are able to relax enough to enjoy it without guilt and anxiety. However, we all experience what is called a pleasure ceiling which is the amount of pleasure we feel comfortable with, both in terms of quantity and quality.

Key elements to feel pleasure are, first, what triggers the sensation, followed by the level of focus we put into the sensation we experience. Both of these elements live within a context and the meaning we give to it.

To quote Betty Martin: “Pleasure is a powerful change agent. Pleasure lets you make friends with your body, and that changes your sense of who you are in the world, and your sense of self-worth, value and compassion”.